Dr. Lulu is a Nigerian-born queer, former US Air Force Lt. Col, disabled veteran, semi-retired pediatrician, 3-time TEDxSpeaker, 7-time bestselling author, youth suicide prevention activist, LGBTQ+ youth advocate and mom of a transgender young adult who lives in, and agitates the governor of, Texas.

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Guest Resources

Download Dr. Lulu’s PDF – 7 Mistakes Parents Make Even When They Want to Accept, Affirm & Support Their LGBTQ+ Children.

Dr. Lulu’s Life Coaching Lounge – Get more details about the amazing retreat Dr. Lulu is arranging for you, Fire Nation!

Dr. Lulu’s TEDxTalk – Rethinking the Closet: Coming Out LGBTQ* vs Inviting In

“Invited In?” pre-order form – Preorder form for Dr. Lulu’s 6th book! “Invited In? How to Become the Parent Your LGBTQ* Child Needs.”

Dr. Lulu’s Parent Support Group – Join Dr. Lulu’s Parent Support Group.

3 Value Bombs

1) We have to look at what we’re doing to these children and how we’re trying to cause something that’s good and otherwise should be celebrated to become something that is bad and almost a burden on the child.

2) LGBTQ+ persons became synonymous with the word closet. The idea was you hide this aspect of your life, you pretend it doesn’t exist. We hide it in a place where no one will find it, which is what we do with closets.

3) Inviting in is about empowerment. It’s about owning your ship – that this is who you are. You have no apologies, and you’re only going to invite others into your space if you find you them worthy.

Sponsors

Thrivetime Show: Is this your year? Visit ThrivetimeShow.com/eofire to see how Clay Clark’s business coaching has helped thousands of entrepreneurs to dramatically increase profitability!

HubSpot: HubSpot’s all-in-one CRM helps you automate tedious tasks, keep track of all your deals in one place, and make sure your whole team has access to the same data. Get started for free at HubSpot.com!

ZipRecruiter: Get your job noticed by the best and brightest candidates – with ZipRecruiter! Go to this exclusive web address to try ZipRecruiter for free: ZipRecruiter.com/fire!

Show Notes

**Click the time stamp to jump directly to that point in the episode.

Today’s Audio MASTERCLASS: Mistakes Parents Make when their Kids Invite them into their LGBTQ+ Worlds

[1:33] – Dr. Lulu shares something that she believes about becoming successful that most people disagree with.

• Honor your inner child.

[2:05] – Dr. Lulu’s coming out story with her father.

• She was born in Nigeria, which is one of the most homophobic countries and one of the most religious countries in West Africa
• Her dad told her that it was just a phase. Turns out, it was not a phase. She didn’t grow out of it.
• There’s an entity in the LGBTQ+ community called “internalized homophobia”. Internalized homophobia only occurs amongst LGBTQ+ persons.
• Most extremely homophobic people are actually closeted gays.

[5:53] – Dr. Lulu talks about youth suicide prevention.

• When it comes to childhood suicide, we must think trauma first.
• When talking about the top three common reasons for suicide, mental illness will make the cut.
• The number one reason for children to decide to jump is usually betrayal from a trusted person around them.
• We have to look at what we’re doing to these children and how we’re trying to cause something that’s good and otherwise should be celebrated to become something that is bad and almost a burden on the child.

[10:31] – A timeout to thank our sponsors!

• ZipRecruiter: Get your job noticed by the best and brightest candidates – with ZipRecruiter! Go to this exclusive web address to try ZipRecruiter for free: ZipRecruiter.com/fire!

• Thrivetime Show: Is this your year? Visit ThrivetimeShow.com/eofire to see how Clay Clark’s business coaching has helped thousands of entrepreneurs to dramatically increase profitability!
• HubSpot: HubSpot’s all-in-one CRM helps you automate tedious tasks, keep track of all your deals in one place, and make sure your whole team has access to the same data. Get started for free at HubSpot.com!

[13:44] – The phrase, “Invite In” and what became of her coming out.

• The whole concept is, number one, whose closet is it anyway? Whose idea was it to put any human experience in our closet?
• It causes multiple ripple effects, like mental health challenges. People are afraid to even say that they’re gay.
• There are two peak periods of suicidal behavior in queer youth. First is when they first realized that they are indeed queer or gay or LGBT; second, when they share with their family members (aka “coming out”)
• The whole concept of “inviting in” is that you as the listener creates a safe enough space to be invited into their world.
• Inviting in is about empowerment. It’s about owning your ship; that this is who you are and you have no apologies, and you’re only going to invite others into your space if you find you them worthy.

[18:43] – The Queen Oprah story.

• She was invited to be part of Oprah’s show and was asked if there is something she does that is of service to the community.
• She works in youth suicide prevention. She’s a black queer physician, mom of a transgender youth.
• A lot of times, she goes to bed afraid – for her child and for herself.
• We all have moments when we experience imposter syndrome, especially as entrepreneurs. We don’t think we’re doing enough. We don’t think we’re making a big enough difference. We don’t think anybody wants to hear what we have to say.
• The truth about ideas – when it comes to entrepreneurship – is if you don’t act on it, God is going to give that idea to somebody else who will

[22:45] – Dr. Lulu’s key takeaway and call to action.

• When it comes to entrepreneurship, you’ve got to put yourself out there. Invisibility is the killer.
• When it comes to accepting your LGBTQ+ child, lack of self-acceptance is the killer.
• If you don’t accept yourself, you cannot accept your child. Now, what lies beneath self-acceptance: self-love.
• Dr. Lulu’s Life Coaching Lounge – Get more details about the amazing retreat Dr. Lulu is arranging for you, Fire Nation!

[25:10] – Thank you to our Sponsors!

• Thrivetime Show: Is this your year? Visit ThrivetimeShow.com/eofire to see how Clay Clark’s business coaching has helped thousands of entrepreneurs to dramatically increase profitability!
• HubSpot: HubSpot’s all-in-one CRM helps you automate tedious tasks, keep track of all your deals in one place, and make sure your whole team has access to the same data. Get started for free at HubSpot.com!

Killer Resources!

1) The Common Path to Uncommon Success: JLD’s 1st traditionally published book! Over 3000 interviews with the world’s most successful Entrepreneurs compiled into a 17-step roadmap to financial freedom and fulfillment!

2) Free Podcast Course: Learn from JLD how to create and launch your podcast!

3) Podcasters’ Paradise: The #1 podcasting community in the world!

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