Gretchen Rubin is the author of several blockbuster bestsellers like The Happiness Project and is co-host of the award-winning podcast “Happier”. Her newest book, The Four Tendencies, was an instant New York Times bestseller. It explores a personality framework that can transform our lives.
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3 Value Bombs
1) People all have different tendencies; it’s like one’s personality.
2) It’s important to know your tendencies so that you can adjust whatever is not working for you.
3) Understanding a person’s tendencies will help you communicate better with that person.
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[01:37] – Gretchen is a writer, podcaster, blogger, and speaker
[01:45] – Her big subject is human nature
[04:12] – A person is either an upholder, a questioner, an obliger or a rebel
[05:49] – The rebel tendency is the least common one to have
[07:39] – When you understand your tendencies, you can see clearly what you need to fix
[08:18] – Being an obliger is the most common tendency to have
- Get accountability if you’re an obliger
[10:04] – “Questioners need reasons”
- Questioners want to be clear about why they should be doing something
[13:12] – Not following through may be because of a person’s personality
[14:41] – There’s no one answer for not following through
[16:51] – Upholders are viewed as rigid people
[17:21] – Questioners are the people who keep everyone on track
[20:41] – For obligers, the biggest revelation they have is their need for accountability partners
[21:08] – In dealing with rebels, try to understand where they’re coming from
[22:10] – For questioners, realize that there is a deep justification for what they do that comes from within
[24:27] – “Knowing how people breakdown can be helpful when you’re trying to communicate”
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